his name is Geoff.

'nuff said.

hold my hand. right now
321 let's go. let's breathe let's be dizzy lets be
incorrect
god i'm incorrect. am i going to hell? am i deciding this now
or can it wait till after the show? i'm almost
done

i'm almost here i've just barely arrived
i have given you everything and you give
nothing. not a thing in return
you leave me to cover myself in
fishnets and makeup and last night's fun
and bottles that i can't count and fights i can't fix
oh and drama. i cover myself in your drama
in the far flung reaches of the unknown abyss of
he said she said we said they said
who says?
who said that this is what I have to be?

I do. I want this.
321 let's go. let's scream. let's be different
let's be nerdy or normal or slutty or gaudy
or nothing
let's be undefinable right now.
just take my hand. my fingers are waiting for yours

let's be ill advised tattoos and the world that
lady gaga created. let's be emphatic and crazy and mascara

let's cover ourselves in mistakes and relationships
and sometimes both. let's cover ourselves in friendships
and frenemies and house names like harry potter.
let's idolize and replicate and keep it from being the same all the time

i always wanted my life to be interesting.

why aren't we doing everything we want right now
why are we holding back?
321 let's go. let's run. let's dance let's laugh
why aren't we laughing at our own
stupidity?
arrogance?
lies?
love?
all of the above?
is the answer D, all of the above?

let's be love on beaches
and fights on dance floors
and parties. we fight all the time.
we are so insensitive to each other
but are the most finely tuned individuals
to each other's emotions. let's break out. let's be
friends?
enemies?
coworkers?
classmates?
family?


D? all of the above?

let's be individuals.
oh. but we already are.
can i join you? can i be one of your pack?
i want to run with you, beautiful
crazy
insane
perfect
creatures of the night.
can i be a part of you
or do i just get to reach out and touch
from behind closed doors
or 1000 miles
or broken car windows or stairwells during fights

can i be with you all? am i one of you?
it's so hard to tell sometimes.
where does the one who's trying
so hard
every moment
every instant
to not be whitewashed into the background
where does she fit in?

321 let's go.
can i go with you?

After crying on the phone to Dani about the fact that Jon is not around, well I had an affirmation (read: i had a HUGE drastic kick in the balls)
I am head over fucking heels in love with my boyfriend.
Dont get me wrong its not like I didnt love him. But I took for granted that he was around. That I could tell him I loved him. That I could show him I loved him. And I always on some level even though I told him I loved him didnt really show it. I have been so preoccupied with stuff that inherently does not matter. ie my parents divorce and the train wreck that has happened because of it. It is THEIR life. THEIR choice.
I have also been concerned heavily about money.
I have been concerned what people at work think of me. Obsessed with getting a good refference.
And in the process I have neglected my best friend. and the love of my life.
And to really drive home that fact it took him hopping on a plane to Israel for two weeks.
I feel sad, and a little lost without him. And ashamed of my self, even though I didnt do it on purpose, i just let things get in the way and lost focus of what mattered.
And so heartbreakingly in love that it feels as though my little five foot frame can barely contain it.
I feel a little like Holly from PS I LOVE YOU. Only I dont want my boyfriend to die in order for me to realize how very much I love him. An out of the blue trip to Israel is as drastic as I want to go.
As he told me before he left:
There can't be a Kirk without Spock.
Well theoretically there can, but something vital is missing.
I just want him to come home to me and our apartment and I want the chance to show him how much he means to me.
I want the chance to be a better girlfriend because I havent been and this is my feeling. He has not said anything remotely close to this. He wouldn't. He loves me too damn much.
And thats something Im still getting used too.

Russian Idioms That Don't Translate Well. Part Dos.

Idiom: Kino c nemtzami.
Translation: Film with Germans
Meaning: A confusing, hectic or absurd event.
Russian Phrase Illustrating Idiom: Ya poshla v supermarket e tam bilo mnogo sumashedshih. Kino c nentzami!
Translation: I went to the supermarket and there were many crazy people there. Film with Germans!

Sent from my iPhone

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Cheesefaildicksmack


My new favorite term to describe many people.

If you think it's related to you, you are probably wrong.

Anyone that this is related to probably doesn't even get it.

Posted via web from Erica's Posterous

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Not a whole lot to say, but I have yet another birthday party to go to on Friday. Looks like I'll be busy with those for a while. :)

More later....

I have to still do Drak'Tharon for some stupid quest thing (oh, two actually), and Violet Hold for a Quest I picked up.

Halls of Lightning too.

Oh, and Pit of Saron.

Anyone wanna do any of these on Tuesday?

Also, I still need to do some Hellfire ones, if anyone has an alt they need to do. I have two of the Trial of the Naaru quests to do (Coilfang, Auchindoun, Shattered Halls.) I like completion, I know I don't have to do them ;-)

Anyone? I'll PUG'em obviously, but I like to run with mah crew.

And in other news, my gear score is over 1700. Wewt. Not bad considering it was a lil' under 1000 a couple weeks ago. heh.

We got up late due to coldness and us well being lazy, I got mushroom, scallion and cheese omelette cooked by hubby, now if I could only get him to do more cooking the rest of the year that would be grand.

Out the door by 1 then off to hunt computer and/or parts. My computer which was my father-in-law's old computer died the black majick smoke of death (aka the motherboard/CPU thingie). So the original plan was a new one (motherboard/CPU/Ram) well it turned into a bloody waste of hunting so we burned rubber over to Microcenter. I now have computer parts in my kitchen and hopefully a computer up and running by next week. I so miss my big monitor (yes i am blind as a bat at times)plus the fact the game I begged for last Christmas got going and then the computer died left me with a complete time of nothing to do but wait I did find another addiction Farmville on Facebook.

I have tomorrow off so I can clean up and clean out some crap...the pantry part 2 and the back bedroom aka closet. I have still to find the good leather gloves and two more presents I hide real well so well in fact I CAN"T FIND THEM!!!

Found the perfect gift for hubby for Valentines day...like who knew my hubby the sci fi / comedy / adventure guy was addicted to the Bowery Boys!

There is a place to get the entire set for the cost of less than I expected to pay AND it will be shipped to work.

Today was a calm quiet day no triggers, no spikes just nice and calm. Just the way I like it.

Wish I could have days like this more often.

I miss you more than anything right now.
Please just be safe. Enjoy your trip and know that I am thinking of you.

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Posted via web from Erica's Posterous

For the first time in more than 15 years, my primary computer has an Intel chip running it.
I've been an AMD guy ever my first AMD K-7 processor. Previously, I had an Intel 486 DX2.

Hopefully, soon it will be upgraded to Windows 7.

There's a door upstairs, from a balcony that never happened. So it's just a long window.

It is so fucking windy, that it got sucked open at some point. I have no idea when. It does explain WHY the fuck it's been so cold up there though!!

In other news, I feel like shit. Warm and squishy. So I'm gonna go off to bed. Make out with Mr. Benadryl. Ooooh yeeahhh.

I heard a rumor that it is Japanese tradition to scrub the house for the new year
I was hoping, like every time I have some time off from work, to complete that this time.

I got a good start and then got sick. Regardless, this has been the best vacation ever.
Besides having missed New Year's at Rob's with everyone because I've been sick since Tuesday, I have done during this time off exactly what i've been trying to do since I moved in - and I can't believe i'm almost done.

I cleaned the sewing room and nearly completely organized all my sewing and crafting supplies.
this includes dumping out all my (4) sewing boxes, a moving box i had full of crafts, and the contents of the drawers of my grandmother's sewing machine table.

I can't believe i did it. I even conglomerated the 3 tins of buttons into one (huge) tin.

I just can't believe it. I can't believe i didn't piss the time away like so many other times before.

well, now to finish and move on to the kitchen, then laundry, and by then, there will be very little to do in the livingroom.

Can I have another few days please? I'm almost hoping that these Furloughs will become permanent. If i had known about it earlier, I would have saved more time for them. Even though i had to take a few days unpaid, I think it was totally worth it this time around.